Ladies, be the man pt2. (Hold me down!!!)

I’ve heard people say (and they’re very right), that single people give the best relationship advice.

If you’re in that school of thought, then it wont be hard to believe that you, ladies, are about to get the best relationship advice of your lives, from a niggy who’s single to stupor. Lol

First advice, grab a drink and popcorn, or chin chin or something....

Often times, ladies have lamented to me, asking the million dollar question, in these exact words... “what exactly do you guys want gan sef????”

You cannot possibly state what all guys want, but if you’re a smart chic, and you follow me dilligently, you would do either of these two things, by the time you’re through with this gist:

1.       Keep your boo on permanent lockdown

2.       Let the niggy go, finally

Let’s start from scratch...

If you paid attention in social studies class (that’s if you went to a dope primary school like mine), you would recall, that a human being needs three basic things:

1.       Food

2.       Shelter

3.       Clothing, shay?

In junior secondary school, they added a few things...

4.       Comfort

5.       Sense of belonging, abi?

Now, let’s be specific...

The anatomy of every normal man craves four basic things... Chill, lemme say it in english:

Every man will be happy where these four things are present:

1.       Food

2.       Sex (or the promise/hope of sex, someday)

3.       Money

4.       Right of ownership (in other words, we want you to be giving it to just us, we don’t like competition)

But we can get these things anywhere na, shay? That’s why a niggy will have a girl that’s cooking for him, giving him her body constantly (I’m trying to sound professional, e no fit me), even giving him money...and still be chasing one olosho up and down....and when we get caught, the y'all will be like...."what did you ever want that I didn't give you?"

Okay, so what’s our problem?

Our problem, is you ma, yes..YOU!

What have you done?

Nothing!!!

And that’s my point right there.

I’m confusing you abi? Sorry, how can I explain this ooooo *scratches head*

Okay, a man is like a company.

Note, I didn’t say a “guy”....I said a “man”

So If you’re out there and your boyfriend is still a guy, this won’t help you, I promise.

A man is someone with a vision, someone that at least, knows what he wants....he may not know how to get it, but he knows what it is....

Guys don’t even know what they want, and you think you can give it to us? Lol. I laugh in spanish...

As i was saying jare..what was I saying sef?

Okay, yeah...so a MAN, is like a company... The owner of that company, is the largest shareholder.

Many chics feel like the niggy is supposed to own them, that's true, but you're supposed to own him too. As long as you're the major shareholder in a man's life, he ain't going nowhere.

How therefore, do you own a man? 

Lemme state first, that if you and your boyfriend have conflicting visions, the earlier you end that relationship, the better....(how una take begin date in the first place sef?)

A man's hustle is his pride, it's his identity, it's what nobody can take away from him, it's his fire...so what a man values the most (even above his bae), is his hustle. Therefore, the only way you can compete with his hustle, is to motivate it. The only way you can compete with his fire, is to be the fuel to that fire.

Have you ever wondered why Luscious Lyon (Empire) was so hung up on Cookie, or why Ghost's wife (in Power), what's that her name again....was so particular about his business? That's your answer.

If your boyfriend is doing rap music, and you hate rap music, just break up with him already. 
If he intends to be a star, and you don't like the spotlight, lol...you're the reason he may never blow. 
If he's a footballer, you should be his primary agent.
If he's a robber, you should be his accomplice, and alibi...
In other words, every Bonnie in a man, needs a Clyde (I'm not sure if i got the order correctly, but you sha get my point)



It'll get to a point, you'd be the nucleus of his whole essence. At that very point, you become the most important entity in his life...and no matter how many fights you get in, the niggy will of necessity come back to you, cuz he's more or less dead, or significantly incomplete without you.



This reminds me of when people use the term "significant other"to refer to your boo, or bae. Most of the time, we're your significant other, but you ain't ours...
A man never gets bored of talking about his dreams, his hustle (we're selfish like that)...imagine you were right at the centre of his dreams, isn't that the life?


If you can't be the Cookie to your boyfriend's Luscious, that is, if you can't be the reason he becomes successful, the least you can do, is to be the Beyonce to his Jay z, or the Kim to his Kanye, that is, have your own hustle, and support his, whenever, and however you can...and this is where Ify's points (in part 1. If you haven't read it, you should) come in...





Another thing, and this one is a bonus, is that every guy has an ego. If you didn't know, know now, that that ego we have, is our strongest weak point. Ladies that know this, are usually very good at keeping their man, or even snatching other ladies'men (ask Cleo Patra).
Every guy wants to feel strong, in charge, and in control. What a smart lady would do, is to give the man an illusion of being in control, whereas, she's the one really running things...
This is where I'm headed...If you can't be in the centre of your man's hustle, make him feel like he's the best at what he does, even if he's not that good at it. This will require you to pay some amount of attention to what he does, so you can surprise him by stating a few details of his job, or skill. Lemme tell you a quick story...

I have a friend, we're not that close, but we play around with music together. Now his dream is to be a superstar rapper (I personally don't see that shiii coming thru, just sayin'), but as a fellow rapper in the hustle, you don't tell your niggy he's whack na,  lol. He however has one thing which I don't...a girlfriend. The girl obviously liked him a lot. Now whenever we were in the studio, and we wrote a few bars, my verse would kill his, with very little effort. In fact, if we were seven on a song, his verse would be the weakest. But by the time the song would come out, he would be one hyping the song up and down. I didn't understand his enthusiasm until one day, when his chic was in the studio with us and the producer played the song. When the song got to his verse, you needed to see the way his girlfriend was delivering her boyfriend's lyrics!!! If we hadn't been around when he was writing the verse, I could have sworn she wrote it for him! At that moment, it seemed like his verse was the dopest on the song, cuz he obviously had a die hard fan, and we didn't...

I can say this with a 100% confidence, that nigga isn't leaving that chic anytime soon, cuz he's happy, like that kid in pampers' advert.

Now, recall when i said earlier that our problem is you guys? and some of you asked me "what have we done?"


Lemme be the one to ask this time....What have you done????